I want our time together to go as smoothly as possible; give this a thorough read-through!
I like to explain my donation policy with the following analogy: I adore the Metropolitan Museum of Art. It's home to one of my favorite Van Gogh paintings, "Cypresses." In order to enter the museum and see "Cypresses," I am expected to make a donation. The donation isn't required specifically to see "Cypresses," but to help maintain the entirety of the museum. Without my donation, the art would get dusty and the famous steps at the museum entrance would crumble. Am I your "Cypresses?"
Donations should be presented in an unsealed envelope within the first five minutes of our date. If we're meeting in public, please place the donation in something discrete like a book or gift bag. If we're in private, simply leave it in an obvious place, like a table, and excuse yourself to wash your hands. In either case, please make no verbal references to it.
Hotel or no hotel, I'm yours. I can easily travel to your hotel in Chicago, and I'm also happy for you to send me a cab to meet you in a nearby Chicago suburb (Rosemont or Evanston.) Should you prefer to come to me, I can host at a charming little apartment in Wicker Park.
I am rarely available for same-day dates, and new friends will require some extra time to allow for screening. I am, however, glad to plan our date as far as three months in advance.
I understand that the demands of life can sometimes get in the way of fun: to that end, cancellations are accepted with no penalty until 24 hours before our agreed upon date. A cancellation made less than 24 hours in advance requires payment of 50% of the rate of our date. At the moment, Amazon gift card is the easiest way to electronically transfer money. If cancelations become a pattern, I will no longer accept bookings from you.
I prefer email to any other means of communication, and do not give out my phone number until we've set our date. I ask that you reserve texting and calling for uses such as making me aware of your arrival and location on the occasion of our date. Additionally, I am not prone to long email conversations—I'd much rather get to know you flesh to flesh.
If we've spent time together in the past six months, I'm happy to provide you a reference. Please send me a note letting me know from whom I should be expecting the request—I need to know it’s ok to divulge how wonderful you are!
Dirty Little Secrets
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